Quickerlinks — The sales tool I built for Directv
This story is a culmination of an event.
Prologue
I hate what Directv has become.
If you genuinely enjoy your television services, then don’t let me stop you. But I sincerely believe it’s a dying industry that will remain alive only by trying people into long-term contracts. And please stop using your email associated with your television company. You won’t ever get access to the email if you stop using your services, holding every service you registered with using that email hostage.
One of my first jobs was selling television services.
Directv offered me free Television, and I turned it down. Why? Because I strongly suspected that should I be terminated, I’d probably have issues returning the equipment, just like every other customer on the planet who called in every day.
One day a satellite would show up in a technician’s truck.
I called the unique number for vendors asking what was going on. My paper had been marked as ‘’yes’’ for free TV changed by someone at work.
Apparently, the Television company had decided I neeeeeeeeeded my free equipment, and the new genie was ready for setup. The satellite installer was confused. Do I not want it? I rolled my eyes and came to a decision. It would look weird if I declined. I had requested to see his paperwork and, after reviewing it for gotchas, approved the install. You don’t need to set up the RID I stated. Are you sure? Yeah, I’ve got this. Just install the satellite.
I guess I’m not the only one who requested to install the equipment themselves because the guy shrugged and offered a clipboard to sign.
After a few minutes, I stopped him from climbing on the roof. That’s the wrong DISH!
What? What do you mean?
That’s a Round 18! it’s non HD! you are installing an HR44? Yeah, that needs a Slimline 3! He looked at the dish in his hand. ‘’oh! you’re right.’’
shoved it back in the van and returned a moment later with the right satellite.
I was very good at the job, but I didn’t enjoy it very much.
I wanted a challenge, and sales were just dull. Nothing I did there had any real-world lasting effect on the world. The highest achievement one could achieve at the place I was contracted would be an operations manager, leading a team of people like myself in one building. Yawn.
Nonetheless, I soldiered on learning myself multiple rewards, many of which I declined.
I saw and still see Television as a dying industry. A never-ending advertisement box with a hard drive that you will pay thousands of dollars for. If you take nothing else from this article, remember this. When it comes time to return your equipment take pictures of the box and pay for a shipping number showing it was returned because, in one year, they WILL attempt to send you to collections as ‘’there is no proof the equipment was returned.’’
I started hiring someone to look for another job for me while I worked. Every day I’d go home and check my email to peruse through job offers. Dissatisfied with the employment systems, I would then attempt to launch my employment network. Several people, I helped leave the company by offering them job offers I’d obtained.
It was around this time that AT&T acquired Directv.
And every single tool became utter crap. AT&T, which knew nothing about Television, had started creating tools for the TV techs to use. You read that correctly a company that knew nothing about their acquisition partner had created new tools for them to use. Out of utter frustration, I started making my own versions of the tools using the mail program’s HTML to make working hyperlinks.
One day I was caught. A coworker walking past the desk saw me use ‘’quickerlinks’’ to complete a sale and interrupted my call.
huuuuuuh? How did you do that!!
when I explained this wasn’t a tool but something I’d built, I got an ecstatic
SEND IT TO ME!!
To explain quickerlinks, picture a tool you log into. Then you log in again. Then if you are unlucky, you log in again!! Then you click a button that lets you open a chart.
Quickerlinks took that chart and attached it to the bottom. All you needed to do was scroll down. it was just a .pdf
Another tool for a short period refused to let you continue without a manager’s override code if you didn’t sell something. (yes, really!) You could then expect that to be brought up in your monthly review. Quick links let you bypass that BS.
Then there was a built-in checklist for pretty much every quality metric. It used the same form quality would use except in a condensed form.
I called this LOC (listening on-call) before realizing this was being said as ‘’cock’’ by teammates and changed it to ‘’QCL’’ Quality checklist.
It soon became a part of my job to send updated versions of ‘’Quickerlinks’’ to all colleagues. If I didn’t, I’d get emails begging for a new version when some new policy introduced a more broken tool. There were, as far as I was aware, around 30 people were using it. I’d soon learn that number was nowhere near accurate.
You could do almost everything in quicker links. What started out as a side project to fix non-working links soon became a practically full-fledged program living in an email HTML. I even figured out how to make working buttons and built an interface.
Every few seconds between a call being answered, I was tinkering with it, slowly improving one function after another.
As AT&T sunk their hooks into Directv, things got worse. Every call now had to include a sales attempt regardless of why the customer called in.
Were you calling in about a high bill? Try upgrading your package! Oh, you forgot your password? How would you like a new DVR? This practice continues to happen today if you call AT&T with agents required to ask you to buy something. I always get a pause when I reply
‘’click decline, then save and exit in your personal offer prioritization tool.’’
Whereas before, calls had been bearable now, every day was nothing but a monotonous undying series of sales calls.
I wanted the SUPPORT calls. I wanted to work with the blind person who wants help setting up a DVR. Send me the people who have unknown charges.. not this sales crap. Nonetheless, I was excellent at it.
quicker links were then updated to build a ‘’recommended’’ section where from a list of keywords, the tool would offer a channel
as an example, type ‘’kids’’ and it would show 301 or Nick Jr.
If you think this was unnecessary and we should have had something that did it for us, you are correct. We DID… under the Directv tools. However, AT&T had terminated that program and promised us something was ‘’coming soon to replace it.’’
So I built my own and, in doing so, further cemented my knowledge on what channel corresponded to what network. I wasn’t getting paid anything extra for this, but dang it; I was bored.
One day I took things too far. I added a checkers game to quickerlinks which caused every single mailbox that used my program to crash. I’m still not sure exactly what happened, but the mail was not having it and closed. That was the day I found out just how many people were using quicker links — far more people than I knew about, way more than the few who emailed me for new versions.
New versions of quickelinks were traded for overtime hours and candy bars. I had, without knowing it created a type of currency.
updates were needed because quicker links worked by capturing a login cookie generated on a successful login. (That should tell you how great their security is!) These tokens would expire, and when they did, along came the flood of emails.
Worse, multiple people claimed to be the creator of quicker links. The next revisions would be more strategically sent, with some people never getting the next version. After all, they could build their own.
Several times I’d walk up to my desk and have candy bars waiting. These were subtle bribes with post-it notes asking if such and such were incorporated in the newest version. One person I remember wanted the work chat client to open in the same tool. (uh..NO!) Someone else was hoping for a glittery sparkling font on the buttons. It was a bit ridiculous buying snacks while at the same time refusing a pile on my chair.
One day, I was told I’d gotten a negative survey from the quality team for a call.
I’d been reading a support manual on rewiring a vehicle’s harness, learning the wiring structure before taking a call.
I had sold that customer on a two-year upgrade and upgraded their channel lineup, which included a $40 extra bill AND sold a remote control. But because I’d been reading before the call started. It impacted my ability as a CSR.
Then at the bottom were noted that made my blood boil.
Use tools: no
Comments:
Incorrect use of one of the buttons in quickerlinks. The tool THAT I BUILT!!!!
First, let me explain that there was nothing new. I knew all the policies front and back. I knew the channels, the procedures used, the prices, and even the hidden hotkeys. Fun fact the software they used to track user activity didn’t register hotkeys, so I had to go back to using keyboard and mouse, or it looked like I did nothing!
If there was any update, I was already reading it. And I was bored out of my skull. So yes, I would read between calls.
So the next version of quickerlinks was a little different.
Only one person would receive the next update.. me.
Everyone else received version ‘’CmiX’’
__________________________________________________________
QUICKERLINKS HAS BEEN SUSPENDED.
PLEASE USE YOUR TOOLS.
For questions on this decision, please see the quality team.
Email:
Now survey this sale
I sit bored in my chair
Build your own.
How’s that for using my tools?
________________________________________________________________
The fallout was immediate and catastrophic.
HR was at first confused that a support agent had created something more than half the building was using.
IT was only a few people who were flooded with support tickets as people complained that Quickerlinks wasn’t working, a tool they couldn’t find in their support and couldn’t install. Other people said ‘’mail’’ wasn’t working, but their mailboxes worked fine. Eventually, someone put two and two together (probably remembering the last time a bunch of emails stopped functioning)
Sales numbers for the week flatlined as people once again had to deal with AT&T’s terrible tools. For everyone but me, that is.
I received emails from coworkers and team leaders alike and watched as the number 1 topic in work chat was ‘’what happened to Quickerlinks?’’
A vendor of AT&T would be coming in the week, and after they demonstrate new features, the call for quick links to be a working application was the #1 question.
Eventually, as the pieces came together, I was called into HR.
The quality girl was there looking pissed.
HR was under the impression a tool had been broken. Well, they were half right.
Okay, so how do we fix quickerlinks?
Did you break a company tool? That’s a fireable offense.
No, it’s MY tool. I built it because the apps from AT&T are garbage.
It only works because the security is horrible. And to be honest, I’m tired of updating it. I get a full mailbox all the time because people won’t stop asking me to correct it. So how do we fix it? You tell AT&T to make better tools for their customer service reps.
And I stopped updating it because you (I gestured at the quality girl) gave me a ‘’didn’t use tools’’ mark on the survey for the application. That. I . built.
It took her a few moments to reply.
Well, you were also reading something before the call came in.
Was that a work approved site?
I ignored the question. Loaded questions aren’t worth anyone’s time. Instead, I turned to HR.
You care about sales, right?
Well.. Yes.
I swiveled around to the quality girl.
How many sales did I perform this week?
Quality didn’t want to answer. I knew I was the highest person without even checking the board.
As long as I’m making sales, it shouldn’t matter if I’m reading in between calls.
‘’But it impacts your ability as a representative!’’
Does it really? I’m reading how to fix a wiring harness to ensure I can continue to come to work on time. That’s what I was reading before taking a call.
How about this.
Give me ONE kbase article I can’t recite on the spot, and I’ll quit. You (I point at quality) won’t have to deal with me anymore, and you (I motion to HR) won’t have to pay unemployment. Go for it. One Kbase article I can’t get correct. Heck, I’ll even write an email on how to keep quicker links running.
Hr and quality exchanged a look.
quality turned to me smirking
I later learned they had been intending to fire me for tempering with a work tool. . I’d just given them both the best answer they could ever hope for.
Okay. A customer calls in with a non-working receiver. She says the TV says no signal. What base is that?
I grinned and recited the steps to fix the problem, remembering to add a sales pitch. I knew what she was planning to do and caught her off guard when I replied to the ‘’remote control needs programming.’’ with the exact steps for that remote.
In the end, I asked Would you like me to recite the list of television codes used to program every TV?
Quality control looked shellshocked. HR looked both impressed and bored.
Point blank, I know what I’m doing. I’m the top salesperson here and the best repair tech to boot. I know every single article. I know how to sell.
I know the serial number on the back of my keyboard!
So what’s the problem?
In the end, it was decided quality would update the survey. I received a pass on everything with all comments erased. Good enough.
True to my word, I updated quicker links again.
About a month later, AT&T would release a new tool that replicated most of the functionality of quicker links.
Today if you work for AT&T, you know the tool I’m talking about.
It’s the one that if it goes down, people go straight to manual forms if it goes down.
Oddly enough, my call reviews were never completed by that quality girl again. After the escapade, she never spoke to me, only sending updates through email. Quite a few times, I realized I had (accidentally) done something incorrectly. However, it was still marked as ‘’pass 100%’’ One call was simply a person who refused to speak and wanted a manager, but I had cheerfully attempted to upsell them according to quality.
In about a week, I’d receive a new email. I’d gotten an interview offer for a new company. When taken, one would lead to me sleeping in the trunk of a car, using bubblegum as a pillow while in the short distance gunshots were fired.
But at least there in the dark, I wouldn’t have to deal with AT&T’s terrible tools.
all thoughts are my own. This article does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of any company or organization mentioned.
